Tag Archives: umbrella

Proud member of the NUA

I’ve got a 6-shot muzzle-loaded cap & ball umbrella*
And I’m not afraid to use it
I take my .44 collapsible shade everywhere I go
for protection, never carry it concealed
Semi-automatic, safe-action, short recoil –
everything I need to keep my hair from harm

See the beautiful fabric
stretched over hinged ribs
radiating from a central pole
with a hammer and tip-up action?
When not mounted, the stock acts as a holster
– No you can’t touch it

I will only give up my umbrella
when they peel my cold dead fingers from around it
I have a right to protect me from the rain
Ain’t no damn socialist going to take that away from me

*There are over one billion umbrellas distributed globally. About 85 percent are in civilian hands

I struggled with today’s prompt at octpowrimo.com: “If … Were an Umbrella”. This poem comes to you with compliments from the Merriam Webster dictionary and Wikipedia The NUA in the title means the National Umbrella Association. As far as I know it doesn’t exist – but I haven’t checked 😉