Very short story

Worked with storybird for the first time today. This was my try-out:


2 thoughts on “Very short story

  1. graemesandford

    This is a great, great concept, Angela, I love the flow and the structure and only think there is the need for a little tidying up of words and phrases in places. I know you write far better stories in English than i in Dutch; so that is not a criticism, merely the observation of the necessity of housework by Ciders herself to make sure that everything is shiny and bright (before Midnight) – But, I really do love this. If you want me to make specific comments on where I see these areas, I can do so – and this are purely my thoughts to a kind friend – feel free to ignore or disagree as you wish – Graeme 🙂

    1. Angela van Son Post author

      I would love that Grae. We could do two things:

      – You comment, I try and rewrite.
      – You edit, I compare versions, and learn from the edit.

      Both would work for me, which one do you like best?


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